Some thoughts on today's sermon

Today's sermon take-away was "Do what God says and then see what God does."  When I heard that my thoughts went back 12 years ago when Daniel and I were dating, and he told me he didn't believe in using birth control.  Sure, ok, I can deal with that...  We got engaged and revisited the subject...still cool with everything.  As it gets closer to the wedding, and I've shared with family and close friends our plan for kids (or lack thereof) I start getting told how crazy we were and that we were doing the wrong thing.  The seeds of doubt were sown in my little fairytale.  As a young, naive, people-pleaser, I started to believe them.  The night before our wedding I told Daniel we needed to talk, and that I didn't think I could go through with "our" plan.  Lots of discussion, lots of tears, and the question of "do we call this thing off??"  I took a leap of faith that night, trusted in the Lord and the man that I believed He had given me as the spiritual leader of our household.  Sometimes, though, when you take a leap of faith it takes awhile for your belief to catch up... We got married, and yep, got pregnant on our honeymoon.  There are a lot of personal details, but those first three months became very stressful and I had a miscarriage at 14 weeks.  A pathology report later would tell us it would have been a boy. :)  Three months later pregnant again, and exactly one year to the day after my miscarriage, a beautiful birth story unfolded.  Thirty-three minutes shy of midnight, I was holding a beautiful baby girl a week earlier than she was due!  LORD, you ARE the great redeemer.  How could I ever doubt your plan for me??  I wish I could say that it's been bliss ever since, and my belief in this no birth control thing was set, but it wasn't.  We got pregnant with baby number 2 the day I stopped nursing baby number 1...they are 22 months apart.  Still "newly" married, learning about each other, the push and pull that goes with it, adding another child, buying a house...things were getting tough.  Then, along comes baby number 3...what am I doing??  I can't keep up, I have three babies at home, my parents divorce, things go into crisis mode, I need help, Daniel's job is keeping him away with longer hours...this no birth control thing HAS TO STOP!  It doesn't, though.  I press on in my faith and honoring the convictions of my husband.  Baby number 4 comes along, and for the most part I start to feel some peace.  Four girls, too.  What a great, even number of kids to have. NOW would be a good time to stop.  Daniel's hours are horrendous at work, I need him more than ever to help with this family HE wanted, right?  Come to find out, the ever increasing horrendous hours were from no new hires, and an eventual whole department layoff.  I had been wanting him to quit for awhile, but Daniel is a man who stays faithful to his work unless The Lord calls him otherwise.  I wasn't the most supportive wife, yet he's so patient with me.  This layoff was such a blessing, but where was he going to work next?  And, with four small children, being without a job needed to be a short time.  He looked, networked, applied, interviewed, entertained a franchise opportunity (we are SO glad he didn't pursue this).  The Lord provided for us during this time in such sweet ways.  Those are some of the best memories.  He was unemployed four months when a former mentor from church called and asked if he was still looking for a job.  Daniel took what he had to offer, and that job has been such a blessing for our family.  Everything's great, right?  Wrong.  I was getting overwhelmed again with our four young girls just in time to find out baby number 5 was on it's way.  I cried.  I really did.  I wasn't ready to do this again.  But, the Lord is so sweet.  He puts just the right people, some of the sweetest, most supportive friends, in my path, and we also find out we are having a BOY!!  We also decided that this would be our first home birth.  The pregnancy, the excitement of having a boy, the birth...they were all amazing.  (It was also within this year that Young Living came along and gave me purpose outside of just doing the mommy stuff.  Healing for the body and spirit).  Now, as I am just a little over 7 weeks away from having baby number 6, I am more content and at peace with "our plan" than ever.  I embrace the difficult days and adore the the five gifts that God has given me.  As we've worked on our marriage, I also see Daniel as my partner in this endeavor, and not just the guy with the crazy idea.  I have seen and continue to see what God has done in my life through all of this and wouldn't change it for anything.  Some people still think we are crazy, but now I smile with confidence and contentment and think that maybe they are the ones missing out. ;)